Stories

God is writing an incredibly powerful story through your life.  He will use every circumstance, no matter what, for your ultimate good and for His glory...even when it seems like the outcome is the exact opposite in the moment. 

God's story through Zac Smith's life is a powerful one:

At 32, Mandy Smith has since lost her husband, Zac, to cancer.  Her resulting story is just as powerful.  (watch it here)

Though they've suffered so much, they've loved God and praised Him for His goodness through it all. 

"God is still God, and God is still good.  To God be the glory!"

Share your stories.  Share how God's worked in your life.  Share His goodness.  Share your journey.  You never know who you might affect.  You never know who might be going through a similar life story and just needs to hear from someone who has been where you've been.  God is bestowing some incredible power in you to be used to change lives.

Whatever It Takes

We volunteer.  We serve.  We sacrifice our time, get up early on Sunday, and pour ourselves into ministering to others.  But are we really willing to lay aside our selfishness to do whatever it takes to reach people for Christ?  Do we really realize how every individual person and every individual role is significant in God's eyes, because we are essentially serving Him?  Do we approach each act of service with that attitude?  ...that what we are doing is eternally significant.  Not only are we serving our great God, but we're also serving His children and potentially changing lives forever. 

Steven Furtick wrote in Sun Stand Still:

When it comes to the ministry of the local church, I believe every member is a link in the chain of the life-change process.  The grace of Christ flows through you into the lives of those you serve.  No act of service is insignificant when done for the most significant purpose in the universe: proclaiming the gospel of Jesus Christ.  When you see yourself as a connector to the current of the power of Christ, everything you do takes on meaning.  You're not just a normal Christian who is just a volunteer.  You're not just a church member or just an employee. Wherever you are, whatever you're doing, you're a connector to the current of the power of Christ.  You are a servant of the Most High God. 

I don't care who you are or what your role is...be it: rocking crying babies, picking up trash, preaching the sermon, serving coffee, parking cars, playing in the band, passing the offering, running sound, greeting people as they come in, or setting up chairs.  In the eyes of God, what you are doing is significant when you are doing it with a heart to serve Him.  I don't even care if it's under the umbrella of "church" on a Sunday morning or not.  Our daily lives should be an extension of what takes place within the building we meet in on a Sunday.

When I was growing up, I spent 6 (if not 7) days a week in my church building.  It doubled as my school during the week.  Kindergarten through 12th grade...that was my "home".  I can still remember one of my pastors (also a teacher) being around the building after school, and he'd always be doing some sort of odd cleaning task.  Vacuuming seemed to be one of those never ending jobs.  But I distinctly remember that he was always whistling while he did it.  I distinctly remember his attitude.  He did it joyfully.  He would say that he was doing it for the Lord, and it definitely showed.  He realized that he was doing it for a greater purpose. 

This is challenge to myself more than anything.  Do I serve joyfully?  Do I do everything without complaining?  Am I willing to be flexible and step in wherever I can be used in the moment?  Am I really willing to do whatever it takes??

Angry

I'll admit it.  I've gotten angry at God.

I've yelled at Him.  I've screamed in frustration and hurt.  I've wept enraged tears.  And yes, I've even dropped words that would make my mother wash my mouth out with soap.

I'm pretty sure we've all been there at one point or another.  Life just doesn't seem "fair" sometimes.  The hammer keeps falling in rapid succession, and you just can't catch your breath between one heartache and the next.  You're at another dead end.  Another closed door.  Another failure.  Another lost battle.  You're exhausted.  You reach your breaking point.  You snap. 

WHAT ARE YOU DOING, GOD?!?!  Seriously, come on!!  This again?!

And yet you hold it together.  You've got it under control.  You pretend like your thoughts aren't raging and inflamed...as if God can't hear them??  So I guess my reasoning has been that I'd rather get it out, voice my anger, and talk through it with God than to pretend like it's not festering inside.  I'm pretty sure He can handle it.  He is God, after all.

I think the key is the end result though.  Sure, I go off on God at times.  I give Him a piece of my mind.  I rant and rave for a little while.  But at the end of it all, there's surrender.  When I've vented to Him, I eventually turn around and ask for His help and His peace.   

“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.

It's interesting that these verses don't say "DON'T GET ANGRY".  Anger is an emotion.  It's going to happen.  Even Jesus got angry.  (granted, I think Jesus' anger was righteous and warranted, while mine purely stems from selfish reasons most of the time)  I think it's pretty clear that it's what we do with that anger that's the key though.  And that's the exact reason why I try to talk it through with God first.  He gets to hear the brunt of it.  And if need be, I have two or three trusted friends who have heard me fully express that kind of anger.  But they are friends who are always there to help point me back to the truth...to God's truth. 

It's not usually as simple as just letting go of the anger and walking away.  Somehow there's a little barb that resurfaces, a little dig, a little reminder of the thing that provoked that uprise of anger in the first place, and there I am again...picking up what I thought I surrendered.  Sometimes it takes continual deliberate effort to keep bringing it back to God.  I'm just thankful He's right there waiting for me every time.

Full

I don't typically get REAL food...meaning, good home cooked meals that actually take time and love to prepare.  But Sunday was Easter.  And Easter typically means a big family meal.  I don't have family close by to celebrate with, but it always seems like someone in my church family steps up and invites me to be a part of their family for the day.  This year was no different. 

Can I just say how much I love people who have made an effort to be aware of the situations and needs of others around them?  Not because I've been on the receiving end of their hospitality (although, I am truly grateful), but because they are such an example to me of generosity, and they inspire me to extend similar graciousness to others.  I love how each and every year, I've been made to feel like I am a part of each of these families that I've had the privilege of sharing Easter with.  I love the amazing food they've all prepared, the laughter, seeing the crazy inner circle of loving families, and celebrating the holiday with incredible godly people.  I am so full.  Full to overflowing.  Not just with food (trust me, I NEVER walk away hungry), but mostly full with that warm fuzzy feeling of good quality community I have within my church family.

I love celebrating Easter with my church family.  But Easter is so much more than a meal.  There is such an excitement that surrounds the day.  It's a day to focus on what Christ has done for us even though we could never do anything to deserve it.  But more than that, I am full to overflowing with joy because it isn't limited to just one holiday.  We can celebrate Christ's loving sacrifice EVERY day.  And I'm so thankful that I can gather with my church family to celebrate Jesus EVERY week.  Easter is all about Christ and the sacrifice He made for us.  But it isn't only about the fact that He was beaten and bruised, that He willing laid down His life, and that He died for us.  It doesn't end there.  That's where it begins!!

After the Sabbath, at dawn on the first day of the week, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to look at the tomb.  There was a violent earthquake, for an angel of the Lord came down from heaven and, going to the tomb, rolled back the stone and sat on it. The angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified.  He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples: ‘He has risen from the dead and is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him.’ Now I have told you.” So the women hurried away from the tomb, afraid yet filled with joy, and ran to tell his disciples.

The women who saw the empty tomb were full to overflowing...filled with joy!!  Christ has risen!!  And two thousand years later, I, too, am full!!  Filled to overflowing.  Filled with joy!!  Because my Redeemer lives!  Christ is risen, indeed!!  And because He lives, my life is purposeful, joyful, meaningful, and just plain FULL!!

Thank You

It's Easter weekend, so that means...
Easter bunnies. 
Easter egg hunts.
Easter candy.  (I'm especially fond of Cadbury minieggs that sadly only come out around this time of year.  I'm so obsessed, that I stock up enough to last me through the rest of the year!)
Little girls going to church in pretty, frilly dresses and little boys with ties and fancy shoes.
Yellow sugar covered Peeps.
Pastels.
Easter baskets with the crazy fake grass that gets everywhere.
Spring flowers.
Hollow chocolate rabbits with creepy candy eyes.
Family ham dinner.
This is how we "celebrate" the Easter holiday.

Remember this commercial? 

"Thank you, Easter Bunny!!  Bawk  Bawk!"  Haha.  Kids in the 80's were too stinkin' cute and so politely grateful?!  Hmmm...maybe that's how I turned out so well.  Yes, you may insert your sarcastic comments now.  :-)

But seriously, how often do we say thank you?  All these kids are thanking the "Easter bunny" for their M&M's.  But how often do we really say thank you for the real reason behind the Easter holiday?? 

Today is Good Friday.  It's a day to remember the ultimate sacrifice that Christ made when He died for us on the cross to pay the price for our sins.  An insurmountable debt that we would never be able to ever pay on our own. 

Two other men, both criminals, were also led out with him to be executed. When they came to the place called the Skull, there they crucified him, along with the criminals–one on his right, the other on his left.  Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And they divided up his clothes by casting lots. The people stood watching, and the rulers even sneered at him. They said, “He saved others; let him save himself if he is the Christ of God, the Chosen One.”  The soldiers also came up and mocked him. They offered him wine vinegar and said, “If you are the king of the Jews, save yourself.”  There was a written notice above him, which read: This is the King of the Jews.  One of the criminals who hung there hurled insults at him: “Aren't you the Christ? Save yourself and us!”  But the other criminal rebuked him. “Don't you fear God,” he said, “since you are under the same sentence?  We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong.”  Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”  Jesus answered him, “I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise.” It was now about the sixth hour, and darkness came over the whole land until the ninth hour, for the sun stopped shining. And the curtain of the temple was torn in two.  Jesus called out with a loud voice, “Father, into your hands I commit my spirit.” When he had said this, he breathed his last. The centurion, seeing what had happened, praised God and said, “Surely this was a righteous man.”

Thank you, Jesus, for your sacrifice.  Thank you for rescuing this lost, wandering, and hopeless life of mine.  I am so unworthy.  Thank you for forgiving my sins, and for loving me enough to suffer so much and endure death.  Thank you for providing a way for me to spend an eternity with You...just to be with You!  Thank you for changing my heart and for giving me purpose and a reason to live.  I cannot say it enough...thank you, Jesus!!

Speechless

Have you ever been so overwhelmed by life's confusion and so engulfed in pain that you honestly just can't begin to even pray about it?  You're numb.  Your thoughts won't come together.  You can't find the words to start pouring your heart out.  You're drowning.  You want to reach out.  You want to find a firm place to stand...a footing of any sort.  But you don't even know where to start.  You can't tell up from down.  You're lost.  Alone.  Broken.  Afraid.  Speechless. 

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.  And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will.

Wow.  What an awesome promise!  Our Father knows our heart's cry even when we can't begin to formulate our thoughts ourselves.  He hears our inner sighs...those heart-wrenching groans.  The Holy Spirit steps in as an advocate on our behalf.  There have been times when it's all I can do to call out to God...my Abba...my Daddy.  And that is enough.

It's amazing though.  As I've sat there in fractured speechless silence, His peace overwhelms.  As I cry out His name, His love surrounds.  As I've crawled up in my Daddy's lap and just wept, He understands my heartache and fear.  Even when I don't think I have the strength to take one more step, I have a great God who is faithfully carrying me through it all. 

My God is so good!

So Blessed

I've truly been blessed with some of the best friends anyone could ever want.  Friends you can share anything with, and they'll still love you when you're done.  Friends you can be completely real around.  Transparent.  Raw.  Genuine.  And even when your life stages or localities change, you know that your friendship will never change.  They're still there for you no matter what. 

I've been contemplating how we made that initial connection.  How we've gotten to know each other.  How somewhere along the way we crossed the line from being mere "acquaintances" to being trusted, true friends.  I don't know how it happened exactly.  I think sometimes God just flat out blesses us.  I do know that there were specific times when we decided to break down those inner walls that nobody really knows are even there until you get close enough and care enough to see them.  And to find people you can trust enough to let them into the inner circle...that just doesn't happen very often.

It's easy to take people for granted.  It's easy to forget how important it is to invest in the lives of the ones you love.  It's easy to get busy and let schedules get the best of you.  It's easy to lose touch and let the really good ones slip away.  It's easy to forget to celebrate your friendships and fail to share your gratitude for them.

So thank you, God, for blessing me with these incredible friends of mine!!  

I had the privilege to spend some good quality time with two of these friends yesterday.  It's crazy how life has changed so drastically within the last year.  They both have wee ones to care for now.  But I absolutely love having the privilege of being a part of their lives...and now their children's lives.  Like I said, life stages have changed, but that deep rooted friendship remains intact.  So I want to say thank you.  Thank you for everything you've done for me.  Thank you for every time you've been there for me.  Thank you for the fun we've had and the crazy antics.  Thank you for the tears we've shed and for the heartaches you've helped me through.  Thank you just for being there to listen and to care.  And thank you most of all for encouraging me to follow hard after God and be a better me.  You are greatly loved!!

Technical Difficulties

Victory Church's theater campus has a live satellite feed of Pastor Curt's sermon each week.  That means the internet has to work both at the Greenfield campus and at the theater.  That means the cameras and the video feed have to work.  And if all of that fails, that means our back up video has to work.  It's crazy to think that ALL that technology decided it just wasn't going to work.  Not just one week, but two in a row.  Of course, maybe it's not so crazy when you think of what our purpose is...of what we're trying to accomplish...of the eternal difference we're trying to make.  Maybe it's not so crazy when you think of the bigger battle that's taking place here besides just technical difficulties.  A spiritual battle.  I believe satan has been doing everything he can to frustrate and interfere in the work God's been trying to orchestrate. 

Two weeks in a row, technology has failed.
But two weeks in a row, God showed up.

Two weeks in a row, things haven't gone the way we planned.
But two weeks in a row, things went the way God planned.

Two weeks in a row, there have been glitches and frustrations.
But two weeks in a row, God has stepped in and worked in spite of it all.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the frustration of difficulties and get upset when things don't follow our plan.  It just makes me curious.  I wonder what would happen if we would step back and realize that even our best laid plans pale astronomically in light of God's plans.  I wonder what would happen in the middle of those frustrations if we would recognize the movement of God and realize that maybe He has something greater that He wants to accomplish through the things we consider to be "failures".

Pastor Eric has been phenomenal at stepping in and handling our "technical difficulties".  He mentioned something last week that has stuck with me.  Sure, we were missing out on the planned sermon that we should have seen via our live feed, but the thing is, maybe someone came that morning and desperately needed to hear the message that was being shared in its place?!  With that kind of perspective...a God focused perspective...every stumbling block we face becomes far less discouraging.

I believe God can take any failure and turn it around for our good.  He can take any seemingly messed up situation and use it for His glory.  He can use us through our technical difficulties to share Christ and change lives.

Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails.

Camping

I'll try just about anything at least once.  Granted, I do draw the line with some things.  Anything having to do with water and the potential of me being submerged never even has a chance. 

My willingness to try new things typically leads me either to LOVING it or HATING it though.
 
For instance, I tried sushi, and now I LOVE it...almost obsessively so.

Camping, on the other hand, ended up on the HATE list...scratch that...it's more like DETEST.  And you want to know why?  Well, I'll let Jim Gaffigan clue you in a little.  And trust me, he's only scratching the surface of my "why's". 

Just Keep Swimming

A friend recently pointed out that my current life's mantra is: One Step at a Time. 
I've just seen over and over how there's the potential to get freaked out and start worrying over the "what if's" of the future when things start to get crazy and seemingly start spinning out of control.  I've had to remind myself (and certain friends) to not get ahead of God.  To slow down.  To breathe.  To trust that God will continue to be faithful one step at a time.

Jesus speaks directly to this point in Matthew: 

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?  Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?  Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?  And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin.  Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.  If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?  So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’  For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.

God's got your life under control.  He's got your future under control.  He's got your current chaos under control.  We're just responsible for today and how we respond in the moment.  We're responsible for stepping up and acting on God's promptings as we recognize them.  We're responsible for following God's leading day by day.  One step at a time. 

Funny.  It reminds me of Dory's philosophy in Finding Nemo.  What do you do when life gets you down?  Just keep swimming.  Just keep swimming.  Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming.  And it goes a little something like this...

And yes, I hope you have the song stuck in your head now.  :-)

Made for More

I don't care who you are, where you come from, or what you do...we're all made to worship.  Whether we want to admit it or not, we all worship.  It's what we were created to do.  It's just a matter of what we choose to worship.  Louie Giglio put it this way: 

Worship is simply about value.  The simplest definition I can give is this:  Worship is our response to what we value most.

Every once in a while we all take a good, long, hard look at where our priorities fall.  Well, ok...if you don't, maybe you should.  Life has a way of getting busy.  Crazy is more like it.  Work takes over.  Schedules fill up.  Kids clamor for your attention.  If you're not careful, even good things like volunteering, serving, mentoring, and the general giving of your time to others can sometimes detract from areas of your life that deserve more of your focused pursuit.  And, as Giglio surmises, I think that's ultimately how you know what you worship: 

You simply follow the trail of your time, your affection, your energy, your money, and your loyalty.  At the end of that trail, you'll find a throne; and whatever, or whomever, is on that throne is what's of highest value to you.  On that throne is what you worship.

We're all in pursuit of something.  We're all searching for value...for something worthy of our time and ultimately, our worship.  There's got to be more to life, right?  I think we're ingrained with a desire to make our life worthwhile.  We want meaning.  And we're all trying to fill that void with something.  We pour our energies into those somethings.  But at the end of the day, are we really any further along?  Do we truly find fulfillment in those things?  Don't we still feel the need for more?  Don't we still fill a little empty?  That something is still missing...  

“He is the God who made the world and everything in it.”...“He himself gives life and breath to everything, and he satisfies every need.”...“His purpose was for the nations to seek after God and perhaps feel their way toward him and find him—though he is not far from any one of us.  For in him we live and move and exist.”

We were made for more than the insignificant somethings of this earth.  We're made to reflect God's glory.  To give Him honor.  To give Him priority in our lives.  We were made to seek God.  To find our fulfillment in Him.  To find new life through Him.  To worship Him.  He is the only one worthy of our worship.  Everything else falls so far short.  Nothing else quite measures up.  The amazing thing is (as Paul said in the verses above), God is not far from any one of us.  This is not an aimless, pointless, or endless pursuit.  God is seeking you.  He wants you.  He loves you and wants your love and attention.  He wants you to find what you're looking for in Him.  He wants you to find life in Him.  He wants you to have more...to have EVERYTHING...in Him.  He is the only one who can truly satisfy. 

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me.

For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

So this is church...

When we think of church, what comes to mind?  A building with a steeple.  Hymals.  Pews.  Ritual.  Bibles.  A pulpit.  Guilt.  Stained glass windows.  Tradition.  Long dresses and head coverings. (yes, I live in Amish country!)  Somber attitudes.  Sleepy sermons.  Choir robes.  A massive overshadowing cross hanging up front.  Showing up every week...same time; same place; going through the motions because it's the "right" thing to do or because it's just what we've "always done".

Why?  Is that really what church is supposed to be? 

In The Prodigal God, Tim Keller raises an interesting challenge in the first chapter:

...in general, religiously observant people were offended by Jesus, but those estranged from religious and moral observance were intrigued and attracted to him.  Jesus's teaching consistently attracted the irreligious while offending the Bible-believing, religious people of his day.  However, in the main, our churches today do not have this effect.  The kind of outsiders Jesus attracted are not attracted to contemporary churches, even our most avant-garde ones.  We tend to draw conservative, buttoned-down, moralistic people.  The licentious and liberated or the broken and marginal avoid church.  That can only mean one thing.  If the preaching of our ministers and the practice of our parishioners do not have the same effect on people that Jesus had, then we must not be declaring the same message that Jesus did.

I believe church is the people.  God's people.  Community.  Gathering together to worship God through music, prayer, teaching, and serving.  Sharing Christ.  Celebrating His goodness together.  Building each other up.  Encouraging.  Extending hope to a hopeless world.  Walking alongside each other and drawing each other closer to Jesus.  It's not about buildings, legalism, or programs.  It's not about ME and what I can get out of it.  It's about serving others.  It's about putting feet to our faith.  It's about taking Jesus outside of our "four walls" and being Jesus in our community, in our neighborhood, and in our workplace. 

I think that's one of the many reasons why I've really loved being a part of the Theater Campus that Victory Church just launched this month.  They're stepping outside of the box called tradition and pushing some stereotypes of that mental image of what "church" looks like to most people.  And it's not just to be different.  It's an effort to reach more people in more communities.  To introduce more people to Jesus.

This is my church!!

I love seeing Jesus in the hearts of our volunteers.  I love serving my church with these people.  I love seeing God work through this community.  This is my family!!

We don't have it all together, and there are tons of hiccups along the way.  We are a bunch of imperfect people.  But by God's grace, we're doing the best that we can with the gifts, talents, and abilities that He's given to us.  And I'm praying that God uses us for His glory and His glory alone...to reach people who don't know Him...to draw in broken people who would otherwise avoid Him...to be His church and share the same message that Jesus did.

The Masters

Yes, I actually LIKE GOLF!!!  And I'm not ashamed to say it.  (plus, it's extra pretty in HD on the big screen where you can see every single blade of grass...ha)  So it's not surprising that The Masters have taken over my tv this weekend. 

Phil Mickelson.  He's the man! 

Here's to hoping that he has a repeat of 2010!!  Go, Phil!!!

Waiting...with shattered dreams

I read Andy Stanley's The Principle of the Path about a year ago, and part of the last chapter really hit me.  Sometimes there comes a point in our seasons of waiting when we have to come to grips with the fact that God's plans are not lining up with our own, and we have to learn how to "let go".  How will you react?  I'll let Andy walk you through it:

"What do you do with the dreams that can't come true?"  "What do you do when it dawns on you that there are destinations you will never reach?"  "What do you do when factors outside your control make it impossible to get from where you are to where you want to be?"  At some point we wake up to the realization that IT...whatever IT is...is not going to happen for us.  As if that weren't bad enough, you look around and it appears that IT is happening for everybody around you.  Everybody else seems to be living your dream.  Everybody else seems to be arriving at your destination.  Everybody but you.  Perhaps it's the God part of the equation that makes your disappointment so...disappointing.  You feel like God made you a promise and didn't come through.  You're convinced that the destination you set your sights on was a destination God placed in your heart.  You're convinced that the dream that can't come true is not just your dream.  It was God's dream for you.  And now, at a time when you desperately need to lean hard on your heavenly Father, you aren't sure He can be trusted.  You've done everything you know to do, and in spite of your best efforts, certain destinations remain out of reach. 

There comes a time in each of our lives when we are forced to turn our backs on something we hoped for, prayed for, dreamed about, and perhaps planned for.  These are usually good things.  But a day comes when we are faced with the reality that they're not going to happen for us.  We aren't going to get there.  That dream isn't coming true.

These are defining moments.  For some, they signal the end of faith.  The disappointment crushes all hope that God can be counted on in the future.  Some panic and do things that only make a bad situation worse.  Others bargain with God, looking for a way to force his hand.  But for many, this is where faith begins.  This moment forces them to face the reality that they have no control over the future and that their only hope is in the Lord.

My mind is flooded with memories of conversations I've had and letters I've received from men, women, and teenagers whose broken dreams and broken hearts led them to the place where they could say, "Let Him do to me whatever seems good to Him."  These are individuals who have learned one of the most difficult lessons of life.  Namely, when it dawns on you that your dreams can't come true, the best response is to lean hard into your heavenly Father...even when it appears that He is responsible for your disappointment.  The only other option is to run from the only one who can bring comfort when you need comfort the most.

Sandra and I had a friend named Debbie Kennedy who died of cancer several years ago.  She was a remarkable woman.  She never married, though she sure desired that.  She never had kids, though she was an incredible second mom to a number of children.  She served in ministry her entire adult life.  She had a joy that went beyond contagious...it was infectious.  You couldn't be around Debbie without smiling.  She underwent several surgeries, chemo, radiation, the whole nine yards.  She was supported by friends, but no family.  Toward the end she said something to me that I'll never forget.  It was the first time I ever heard anyone say this, although I've heard it several times since.  I was asking her about how she maintained her faith through the pain, the disappointments, the treatments, and the complexity of living with cancer.  She smiled and said, "Once I was able to accept the cancer as coming from the hand of my heavenly Father, I was okay."  I was stunned.  Cancer, from God?  She went on to explain that as a child of God she believed that God had the final say-so over what could and could not enter her life.  She didn't pretend that cancer was a good thing.  And Debbie didn't view God as the cause of her cancer.  But she accepted it as part of his plan for her.  She told me, "In the beginning I would argue with God.  I told Him that I had more to do and that I didn't have time to be sick.  But as long as I argued, I had no peace.  Once I accepted this as part of His will for me, I was okay."  Debbie slipped out of this life into the next with friends holding hands around her bed, singing her favorite worship choruses.  Some of Debbie's dreams never came true.  But she never doubted God's faithfulness or love for her.  Even in the most excruciating circumstances, she was able to receive all that came her way as coming from the hand of her Father in heaven.

So what do you do when your dream can't come true?  When you realize that a destination is out of reach?  You can be angry...angry with God, angry with life.  You can despair.  You can try to make something happen anyway.  But at the end of your striving and manipulating, nothing will have changed.  You will be just as far away from whatever it is you desired.  But now you will be far from God as well.

Your other option is to do what hundreds and thousands of believers through the ages have done.  You can drop to your knees and cry out in disappointment to your heavenly Father.  You can mourn the loss of your dream, then wipe the tears from your eyes and say to God, "Do to me whatever seems good to you.  I still believe.  I still trust.  And I will continue to follow."  You pray, "Not my will, but yours be done."  And then you rest in the fact that you have done all you can...and all you should.

Wating...in the interim

There are times when I've felt pretty useless.  Life ebbs and flows, and there are these periods when I've felt like I'm just sitting there...just taking up space....feeling like a lump.  I've gotten stuck in that mental trap again.  Stuck in that time warp between where I've been and where I want to be.  Those dreams are just. out. of. reach.  That hurt just. won't. fade.  There's a glimmer of hope, but it's almost too dim to tell if it's real.  Something has to give.  Something just has to change soon, doesn't it?  And here I am...still waiting.

You know, I'm tired of thinking I can't do anything until that ONE BIG THING comes to pass.  I'm tired of the self-pity.  I'm tired of feeling like my life can't move forward until the wait is over.  I'm tired of waiting for someday and wasting the life I have today! 

So what can you do "in the mean time"?  God has given us right here and right now.  God has given us TODAY.  I believe that God has given all of us gifts and the ability to serve other people.  And that's not contingent on your economic status, your stage of life, your health, your age, or whether or not you think you've finally "arrived".  Ask Him to help you find ways to develop what you have available to you right now.  Ask Him to grow your faith.  Ask Him to use You.  Ask Him to help you discern His hand and give you wisdom to walk through the doors He is opening without hesitation.  Ask Him for the humility to see your shortcomings.  Seek out opportunities to serve.  Seek out ways to connect with other people who are hurting like you are and reach out to them.  Support.  Encourage.  Instill hope.  Share Jesus and what He's doing in your life. 

The more I think about it, maybe the real gift isn't in arriving.  Maybe it's the wait in and of itself? 

It's amazing how much more intensely I've sought God when I'm in one of those overwhelming seasons.  Those are the times when I've felt His presence so much more acutely.  I've devoured His Word.  I've prayed incessantly.  I've learned to trust Him implicitly.  I've fallen more deeply in love with Him.  Honestly, I wouldn't trade those times for anything in the world.  More than any other time, those seasons of wait have strengthened and deepened my relationship with my Father as I've run hard after Him and surrendered everything to Him along the way.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.  Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.  If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

Waiting...in worship

Tuesday's Tune:

It seems like when we're in the middle of the wait, we tend to become terribly self-absorbed.  We lose our joy.  We fail to connect with our Savior...to worship Him in the middle of our personal turmoil.  Funny thing is, He's the only source of genuine hope that we have in the waiting. 

In Acts 16, after Paul & Silas were beaten and thrown into prison without a trial, they weren't sitting there complaining.  They weren't sulking and drowning in self-pity.  They weren't angry for the unfair treatment they'd been given.  Nope.  They were sitting in their stocks, praying and singing hymns to God.  They were worshiping while they were waiting.

So stop focusing on yourself, and start focusing on our great God.  Worship Him.  Dive into His Word.  Sing praises to Him.  Pray.  You'll find encouragement, hope, peace, confidence, strength, renewed faith, and freedom in the process!

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting, I will serve You
While I'm waiting, I will worship
While I'm waiting, I will not faint
I'll be running the race even while I wait

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait

I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord

WOW, GOD!!!

Victory Church officially launched their Theater Campus at Penn Cinema this past weekend.  What a morning!!

Have you ever just full out known that you're right where God wants you to be?  That He is actively working and moving, and you're right in the middle of it all.  Getting to help.  Getting to serve.  Getting to be a part of God's movement?! 

Wow, God!!!
(Or as Pastor Eric put it..."Holy cow, God!"  haha!)

Sunday morning was a flurry of activity.  Volunteers arriving even before 7am to start setting up and preparing for our 9am service.  (We really do have some of the most amazing volunteers...with the greatest hearts!!)  Hanging up banners, posters, and signs.  Getting coffee and donuts ready in the cafe.  Organizing the information hub.  Setting up sound, lighting, and instruments.  Rolling out carpets, supplies, and the check-in center in the kids area.  Rehearsing, sound checks, testing the media, and on and on and on.  Yeah, I'll admit, I was a tad frazzled beforehand, and I wasn't even "in charge"?!  There were a lot of last minute unanswered questions.  There were some things that hadn't been fully tested yet.  No one really knew what to expect for sure.  We're in Lancaster County...this kind of thing doesn't happen every day!  Then I walked out to the lobby about 20 minutes before "go time".  And that's when it hit me...

Wow, God!!!

These people coming in...THEY are what it's all about.  It's not about programs.  It's not about how "cool" we can make our services.  It's not about whether things run perfectly.  Yes, there is a means to an end, but more than anything, it's about reaching these people and connecting them to Christ.  It's about a smile.  A friendly handshake.  It's about being Jesus to every single person who comes through those doors.  It's about those 274 people who showed up for day number one of this new venture.  And MOST of all it's about the two people who came to know Christ for the first time!!  Now THAT is flippin' awesome!!  And THAT is ALL God!

Wow, God!!!!

There is no greater honor than offering up your life to the Creator of the universe, and having Him turn you around to be used within His incredible plans.  To be used in other people's lives...to touch the community around you...to minister to others...to bring them closer to Him.  And when it all comes down to it, at the end of the day, I could care less if things don't go quite "as planned".  I'm celebrating the fact that there are two more people that know Jesus!!  That lights me up!!  Because THAT is the whole point!!

WOW, GOD!!!

...there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.

OPENING WEEKEND!!

Victory Church Theater Campus is launching THIS SUNDAY!!! 

I am so excited to have the privilege of partnering with this ministry!! 
I am so thankful for the opportunity to serve within this community!!
And I so cannot wait to see what God is going to do and who He is going to reach through this church!!

9:00AM
SUNDAY, APRIL 3rd, 2011
PENN CINEMA, LITITZ

Come check it out!!  It's gonna be awesome!!